Thought 354: "Romantic Relationships"--Free in Principle, but not in Practice from Ryan's devotional book series Thoughts

 

 

Thought 354

“Romantic Relationships”

Free in Principle, but not in Practice

      God does have guidelines, and He will make a way for His perfect plan to be accomplished in our “Romantic Relationships” if we will wait on Him. The Lord has given us a free will which we can take a detour with that produces permanent consequences. God will chasten our disobedience to His absolute laws of right and wrong.

Side Note:

Noah Webster’s 1828 dictionary defines Romance as that which vaults or soars beyond the limits of fact and real life; Romancer as one who invents fictitious stories; and Romantic as Pertaining to romance, or resembling it ; wild ; fanciful ; extravagant ; as a romantic taste; romantic notions ; romantic expectations ; romantic zeal. Improbable or chimerical ; fictitious ; as a romantic tale. Fanciful ; wild ; full of wild or fantastic scenery ; as a romantic prospect or landscape ; a romantic situation.

In light of those definitions of “Romance,” I do not encourage or recommend it and have only used the word for the sake of relating today’s’ topic to you. Even though a modern definition may differ from the 1828’s, both still depict Romance as wild and fanciful. Far too many Christians fall into the trap its illusion, especially young girls. So many books and movies are filled with it and there are many people that search in vain to find it. But in light of a Biblical worldview, we should be very cautious with anything that propagates the idea of Romance. A further look into history reveals a concept called Greco-Roman love. This conception of love is based on the pagan Greeks and Romans who propagated perverted sexual pleasures, worship, “art,” and literature. A Christian should be on his (and her) guard against the widespread philosophy of “Romantic Love” for it certainly does not line up with God’s definition of Love-1 Corinthians 13.

  Our word for the day regarding “Romance” is WAIT. The Bible teaches in many of its’ verses about the importance of waiting. If we wait upon the Lord for our strength (Isaiah 40:31) and we wait for Him in the deserts and valleys that we go through (Isaiah 43:18-19), why not in our relationships? And why not in “Romantic relationships”?

      Readers, romantic relationships are not something to fool around with; and unfortunately many in the World and in the Church view dating, kissing, sex, lust, pornography, and temptation as a game, not as sin and a stumbling block to others. Many date simply for enjoyment or to-get-to-know the significant “beauty” that they laid-eyes-upon. When one does this he is putting his trust and his heart in the hands of his emotions and not in the hands of an Omnipotent, Sovereign God who already has the “right one” selected for us according to His will. The big issue is: will we wait (sexually and emotionally) on the one the Lord has for us or will we look—search—for The One and simply let “fate” lead us into the “perfect relationship”?

       Really listen to the following wisdom that many grasped too late in life to spare them pain:

#1 There are no perfect relationships. There are no perfect men or women, we all commit wrong.

#2 All are sinners and fall short of perfection: this further disproves the illusion of having a “perfected life,” because it isn’t even a possibility.

#3 Forgiveness is essential, we have to forgive the past of our future spouses and promise to not hold it over their heads. Just remember, we have all sinfully trespassed, but Christ can forgive them and will forgive Him if they repent and place their faith in Him. As His image bearers, we should forgive as well.

#4 Fate isn’t real, God directs everything, yet He allows Satan to tempt you at times and He restricts Satan at other times (check out the story of Job)

#5 Looking for something that God has already promised to give you one day is just impatience and it leads out hearts into a state of being more prone to sin because we are ‘weary’ of waiting. Don’t try to hurry God along because it won’t work.

#6 Waiting for the Lord is always the best option. Obedience to the Father brings blessing, but disobedience brings a curse (check out God’s promise to the Israelites).

#7 God has picked someone out for you that is beyond what you could ever find on your own.

                I encourage you to make the choice to surrender EVERYTHING to God, even “ROMANCE.”

 

Thought 326: Establishing God's Guidelines for Romance from Ryan's devotional book series Thoughts

Thought 326

Establishing God’s Guidelines for Romance

     Romance is a commonly misunderstood subject in our culture today. Do you know any of God’s guidelines for marriage? What about dating, I mean, is there anything like that in the Bible? Or what about courtship? This is only a couple of questions, but there is a lot of Biblical principle and wisdom on this subject of “relationships.”

      First, following the direction of the Holy Spirit in alignment with the Word is everything. Many follow and seek God’s direction and is will in their career, problems, and hardships, so why not in “romance” to? After all, this area is very confusing, painful and routine for just about everyone that attempts to build their own ”Hollywood love” story. Even Christians many times passionately want the lights, the  fireworks, and the THE HEAT of a head over heels relationship with the opposite sex.

     God does have rules though, and those rules are for our protection. For instance, nearly every New Testament book warns us of sexual immorality: it is a big “no no” for God’s people. The Bible says there is not even to be a hint of sexual immorality among you (Ephesians 5:3). Not even a hint! Unfortunately, that is not what is thought of when people look at the American Church.

      Older readers, think back to the times of your youth with the young men or young women; likewise you young’uns think back to your recent past or just examine your present “relationship.” Are dating relationships today void of sexual immorality? Among Christians circles? Is there truly not even a hint of sexual immorality, which is as simple as a wanting desire (lust, which is a form of pride)?

        Hands interlocking around his neck she passionately kissed him . . . he grabbed her and kissed her (that was the first time he had ever expressed his “feelings” for her), but just a few hours later everything he ever knew as right was thrown out the window as they stared at each other longingly in the back of his car. . . . .and now they are both feeling guilty for the crime they have just committed before God and what they had stolen from each other’s future spouses . . .

        This story and many others out there relate the timeless truths of Proverbs. Just take a look and see how many of these stories are described in other terms in that book—you will be amazed what you find.

⁹  In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night:

¹⁰ And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart.

¹¹ (She is loud and stubborn; her feet abide not in her house:

¹² Now is she without, now in the streets, and lieth in wait at every corner.)

¹³ So she caught him, and kissed him, and with an impudent face said unto him,

¹⁴ I have peace offerings with me; this day have I payed my vows.

¹⁵ Therefore came I forth to meet thee, diligently to seek thy face, and I have found thee.

¹⁶ I have decked my bed with coverings of tapestry, with carved works, with fine linen of Egypt.

¹⁷ I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.

¹⁸ Come, let us take our fill of love until the morning: let us solace ourselves with loves.

¹⁹ For the goodman is not at home, he is gone a long journey

--Proverbs 7:9-19 KJV

  Solomon’s life, like his father David’s, was filled with compromise when women were “part of the package”. Solomon gave into beauty, charm, and sex – the very things that God wrote through him not to do when the book of Proverbs was penned. The man had A THOUSAND WIVES! For being so wise, he turned out to be “pretty lame.” Only one wife is permitted to a man (Genesis 2). It has been that way since the beginning.  God created one Eve for Adam, not a Hiram. How could Solomon ere so greatly; after all, the guy had it made? Because he gave up his relationship with God for a season just to have the ladies. Young men, young ladies are important. I mean, I am excited that one day I will spend my days with the amazing woman that I can call my wife for the rest of my years and every young woman should be treated with respect. But . . . . we need to surrender our desires to God. The book of Psalms declares that if you delight yourself in the Lord he will give you the desires of your heart (Psalms 37:4). But understand this: those desires are not lustful.

     The warnings of Solomon in the book of Proverbs are amazingly applicable to our lives. Solomon was the wisest that ever lived (other than Christ), yet he didn’t even follow the commands that he gave to his own son to whom he appears to have written the Proverbs. Solomon wrote the Proverbs under the direction of the Holy Spirit and did not truly ‘think them up’ on his own; therefore, these aren’t just guys’ opinions, they are the very Words of God.

Thougt 190: Are you crazed by "love" from Ryan's devotional book series Thoughts

                                                                Thought 190

Are you crazed by “love”

What is “love"? It is that gushy, bubbly, suspenseful feeling that you get when you are around someone that you are attracted to…right? Wrong. You see, in our culture, and in past times, men and women have accepted this common lie. Even Solomon and David seem to have been ensnared,  just look at all those wives; many men have fallen prey to a pretty face or a “hot” body. But the book of Proverbs teaches us differently…

God’s Word applies to every area of our lives, but sometimes we have to do a lot of prayer, Bible reading, and study before we know what to do. God does not always just tell us what to do, but rest assured that His Word is TRUE and HE wants you to have a personal relationship with Him.

Examine your soul, motives, and your past…pray about, and do some Bible study, on how God wants you to approach romance, whether you are married or single. I believe the Lord’s Word has something fresh for all of us—it may be a reminder or something new.