One Act
Play, January 14, 2011
The Not so Normal, Should-be Normal Christian Day
(fictional)
Characters:
Mr. M: The host
Mysterious X: A man
with wise sayings.
Mr. Whitney: A close friend of Mr. M’s
Setting:
Mr. M’s residence.
A single
spot light on stage. Have Mr. M walk in from stage right (the door) and begin.
MR. M – (arranging the
table and picking up a few toys of the floor mumbles) “I wish the kids
would keep the house cleaner.”
(Mr. M
continues picking various items up and putting them away then he gets on his
knees.) He prays, “O Lord, please bless this time with my close
friend, Mr. Whitney, and may this fellowship time build both of us up and
challenge us to become more like Your Son. Amen.”
NARRATOR: The reader would be wise to note Mr. M’s
prayer for a challenge. Little did Mr. M know that his prayer would be answered
and the challenge would be much bigger than he ever thought it would.
Doorbell
rings and Mr. M walks over to open it (Stage left). Upon opening the door Mr. M
sees Mr. Whitney and Mysterious Mr. X.
MR. M – “Hello, Mr Whitney, and who is this? This is
______________ (The reader must understand that Mysterious X’s name cannot be
revealed due to security threats that might result from such action.)
MR. M CONTINUES – “please come and sit down in the living
room and make yourselves at home.”
MR. WHITNEY – “So how has work been, Mr. M?”
MR. M – “It has been going well. It is growing and the work
is hard, but it is growing well.”
MYSTERIOUS X – “Did you ever think how much time we waste on
pleasantries?”
MR. M – “Where did that come from?”
MR. WHITNEY – “Mysterious X has a tendency to be very blunt.
Sorry.”
MR. M – “No that is quite all right.”
MR. WHITNEY – “So, Mysterious X, what is it that you would
like to discuss?”
MYSTERIOUS X – “Well, what matters the most? We can talk and
talk and find no solution. Getting out there and trying things we accomplish
more than we can ever discover in a mere conversation.”
MR. M – “So, what do you believe matters the most?”
MR. MYSTERIOUS – “I think that living what you already know
is right matters most. For instance, I know that you, Mr. M, are a prominent Minister
and my friend, Mr. Whitney would be labeled as a solid Christian business man.
But I think that the real issue with you Christians is that you sit around
talking more than going around and doing.
You see, I have read
your Bible from cover to cover and this Jesus guy was pretty awesome. He spent
time doing stuff with and for people.
But you guys claim that you are His followers and yet you sit around more than
most of the people that you would label Pagans. You always seem to preach the
message of living for Jesus, when you yourselves are just living as Holy Couch
Warmers.
Sorry, I don’t mean
to demean you completely, but demeaning is probably what you “Christians” (Mysterious X motioning quotation marks with
his fingers) need so that you can get back to reality. You might have this salvation
that you claim to, but until us Heathens start to see you living it, why would
we follow? . . . . I think that that will give you two a conversation for a
whole day. And that is why I don’t like Christianity. And, yes, I have just
labeled you like you would have labeled me – critically.
Goodbye, I must be getting to my rounds, I have a lot to do
today and a lot of Christians to convert into Real Humans.”
(Mr. M
rises and thanks Mysterious X for coming and shows him to the door.)
MR. WHITNEY – You know, he’s right, we sit around trying to
solve problems through speech and study rather than living out what we already
know to be true. I’m sorry old pal, but I need to go and pray and think over
this. . . . I just can’t help, but believe that God just gave me a message for
my life through the mouth of somebody who doesn’t even know Him.”
Mr. M rises
and shows Mr. Whitney to the door. He comes back to the living room and kneels
next to the coffee table.
MR M. – “Lord, I didn’t expect a challenge like this . . . .
but maybe this is why my life seems so hard, I continue to schedule times to
talk, but over and over I don’t live it. Please help me . . . What’s that? . . . . Yes, I know that you have given me
all things . . . What? . . . . What do you mean I need to use my authority in
Christ . . . . God? . . . . What do mean
think about it, you’re supposed to help me.
GOD –“ I already have helped you. The man you just heard bore a message from Me although He does not serve Me. Get this one right and then come back for another life-realigning....I love you, but I am not going to take this away quickly... you're going to have to work this one out in your life over time."
Almost, The End
The
obituaries the characters:
Mysterious X:
(19?-20?) Renowned social reformer, Mysterious X, lived a
full life of 87 years and was founder of the Stop Being Christians and Start being a Real Human corporation,
which has sold millions of 10 page how to guides to living a good life. His
lectures where always short and to the point, but many were changed by them.
Among other things, statistics estimate that 300 million have left Christianity
to follow the example of Mysterious X. His followers, say “The fact that so
many have turned to Mysterious X’s teaching proves that this is the only true
religion.”
His wife of 60 years
and his 9 children mourn the death of their father at the Get It Right Cemetery, at 7 am on Friday the 17th. They
humbly request that you join them for a time of DOING SOMETHING after the
service.
Mr. Whitney:
Mr. James Alva
Whitney was a multi-millionaire who won millions for the Christian cause. He
attributed his success in life to a Saturday morning discussion with his dear
friend Mr. M and renowned social reformer Mysterious X. Throughout his life
Whitney said that, “When I am in life’s deepest rut I know that I still need to
keep on doing what Christ would do and wait for the harvest to come.”
Mr. Whitney was asked
many times throughout his life why he never went into the ministry. His answer
was, “God gave me business for my income, ministry is simply my life, not my
career –and it never will be my career.”
Whitney leaves behind
many loving friends and his huge grants to small ministries and Christian
businesses around the country.
Mr. M:
Founder of Change Your Mind for Christ Ministries,
discarded his first ministerial endeavor Right
Living Ministries for what he called, “my true calling.” Many people have
claimed life changes because of reading Mr. M’s writings and working along with
him in what he called, “Doing as Jesus would ‘a done it.” Mr. M is also
credited with working closely with the multi-millionaire, Mr. James Whitney in
what he called, “Discipling by saying
follow me.”
Mr. M leaves behind a
wife of thirty years and 5 children, who now live what their dad called “the
REAL life.”
The End
